Saturday, January 31, 2004
this is gonna be a long weekend.
a very, very long weekend.
when you feel so down,
it makes it even longer.
the fact that monday is a holiday makes it even worse.
i dontknow why.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 31.1.04
Empty Havens over.
yes im relieved but i do miss it
though the rehearsals were rather slip-shod
and stuff were quite unprepared
but the excitement, the exhiliaration, the bountiful satisfaction i feel
after performing on stage
it crashes over me once again.
seriously, this years performance was better than last years
not sure if everyone felt like that
but i sure did.
and a few others too.
so yea it wasnt as bad as i expected.
maybe thats why i felt so satisfied after the whole performance was over
because before that i was rather skeptical of the level of reception.
and that i was rather scared it would turn out badd.
im sorry if any other drama people are reading this
but i have to be truthful.
and because im being truthful,
i must applaud all others who put in so much effort as well!
director, stagemanger, curtainpuller, lightings, sound.
chorus, classmates, mum+dad
and of course sue.
you all did a fantastic job of bringing out the essence of the script.
thanks for making the first performance for this year so wonderful and fulifilling.
there are many more to come.
and that is what im looking forward to.
-
fridays running low this week
where the black eye cant tell tales
she rushes home with one heel broken
and greasy half-painted nails
the soulful gaze in the hallway mirror
creates a sense of confusion
her hair in stringy strands of limpness
wet from the rain on the pavement
starlight shoots across the nightsky
she ponders on her fate
the day she dreaded, yet she wanted
today had come so late
padding softly to the kitchen
she opens the refridgerator door
she peers in - she doesnt dare to look
her eyes cast on the floor
hesitantly, she looks up at the cake
and takes it out gingerly
places it on the table,
lights a candle,
then whispers
happy birthday to me.
loke said that the happy birthday scene was really good
it has rosen to former glory, as put by sumi.
hahha im glad it made an impact.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 31.1.04
Thursday, January 29, 2004
thanks
shortfart!!
i mean victor.
alright i said my thanks already.
i see you kept your promise.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 29.1.04
i didnt know it was edgar
my bad.
i think im about to die of fatigue and sleep loss
i cant stand it when no one appreciates
am i being too wanting
or needful for what i cant get
or what i dont get
because i expect it?
but when its due, its due.
isnt that right?
I DONT KNOW.
unappreciated
damnitdamnitdamnitdamnit.
i think i put in too much time and energy
yet im not repaid.
damn it.
i want to stop caring
but i cant.
its my life.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 29.1.04
Monday, January 26, 2004
this is nice.
from childhoods hour i have not been
as others were; i have not seen
as others saw; i could not bring
my passions from a common spring
from the same source i have not taken
my sorrow; i could not awaken
my heart to joy at the same tone
and all i loved,
i loved alone.
- edgar allan poe
Godrocksmysocks (: - 26.1.04
Friday, January 23, 2004
cny has been funn!
..
U
haha that was an attempt at a smiley
wonder what it will turn out to be after i publish.
went visiting..
but this year was different.
i got to see my other side family too!
i usually see my maternal side family only
but this year my dad organised for the paternal side to meet for lunch
wahhh sumptious again.
hahaha lao yu sheng!
wonderful
watch the last samurai yesterday!
it was fabulous.
probably one of the greatest movies ive ever seen in my whole entire life.
and NO it wasnt because of tom cruise
like i care about him
honestly, i actually think he made the movie look weird
hahah because he was the last samurai
but we already know he is like not a samurai..?
and hes a famous celeb who was with nicole kidman and is currently with penelope cruz (he still is right?)
yea i mean.. get my drift?
ermm ok never mind.
maybe its just the impression that i have of him already that is hard to break away even when i watch the movie.
baahh
anyway, back to the movie
i was so impressed with the samurais!
they are so honourable
and really really loyal to the king
i was so touched during the movie
i vowed to be loyal as well.
to God, my family and my friend.
and they are so brave.
even when they knew they were fighting a lost cause,
they never gave up.
like the part when the samurais came to rescue the head samurai, and the latters own son got shot already,
and he was like on the verge of death
but he still went forward to shoot down some soldiers with his bow and arrows and in the end he got blasted by their guns
it made me so sad.
and so proud of them.
haiiiiii.
met joe briefly in lido.
i was going up the escalator and he was going down the escalator.
so funny.
what a coincidence.
anyway..
my maternal side family is like, really crazy.
hahha we all stayed up at my cousins house to watch a midnight movie together.
so after dinner we lazed around.
my sis, my cousin and i wanted to go out to watch our own midnight movie.
but my sister couldnt agree to watching peter pan
what a wet blanket!!
in the end we just brought the little kiddo cousins downstairs to buy ice cream
and after we went up,
my aunty planned some activities!!
ahah ermm we sang cny songs. (!!)
and played really funny games.
then finally settled down to watch the midnight movie.
well because its CHINESE new year,
my uncle rented a CHINESE movie to watch.
double hero
at first i was having reservations about it..
but it was so goooooood!
the plot was really cool
and ok, leon lai made it cooler.
hahhaha everyone should go watch it as well ok.
its in cantonese by the way
but there are english subtitles, dont worry!
if not i wouldnt have understood as well.
yupp.
one thing i learnt from the movie,
is to say what you want to say before its too late.
haha dont wait till its too late..
in other words,
carpe diem.
is that right?
or seize the day.
hmm yyeaaaa
oh well its been a fulfilling cny.
i havent counted exactly how much yashuiqian i collected
the moneys still in the respective angpows, not even opened yet.
hmm now the wet blanket bit..
ive to do my homework.
what homework is there..??
Godrocksmysocks (: - 23.1.04
Thursday, January 22, 2004
happy CNY
its that time of the year again.
whoohoo
this is good man.
actual school only for two days.
ohyea the pot luck yesterday!!
it was so funn.
-beeeeg grinn.
my classmates really rock man.
the food they brought was sumptious
and when we did the yuuuuuuummmm-seng,
it felt so good to be part of 2T06
we did it twice somemore.
hahha once inside the classroom
and the second one outside for the whole school to hear.
hhahahaha sandie joined us!!
but that joe was too late
and mira was nowhere to be found.
pangs beehoon was really nice!
bevs fried rice was good.
and the potato salad was great as well.
hahah thanks you all!
-muuahh.
the J3s came backkkk!
i was so surprised to see them
but happy as well of course.
jiang minsi nicole cheryl gary khairi kenneth
gary and khairi had no more hair!
oh man it was so funny.
so weird to see them botak
and my official apologies to gary..
called him khairi the other time
and yesterday i thought he was jiang
hahaha im really really sorry.
went to T33 to visit
mr gan is so funny
he thought i would forget their names already
but no of course not!
haha they showed me the sji yearbook two years back.
javier was so pretty!
no javier IS so pretty
hahhaha chiobu.
went out after that
with aishah philene loke daryl justin kennethkow kennethzhang max minsi gary jiang angela
wanted to go play pool at ssc
but it was closed.
then in the end we went spotlight
haha played around with the stuff there.
the feather stuff and halos
and we even took photos!
so funny
but i doubt i will upload them onto the net
philene will probably do so anyway.
wanted to go bowling after that
but i was too tired.
anyway i cant bowl for nuts
so i left to go home
came home and fell asleep
woke up, then went for reunion dinner at my grandparents place!
wheeeeett
the food was greeaaaatt
absolutely magnificent
but my stomach sucks man
get full so easily
haii wasted.
but it was still good!
steamboat, of course
with abalone.. wow.
hahaha my grandma rocks.
watched some lame show on tv too
so dumb.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 22.1.04
Wednesday, January 21, 2004
hey to all of you:
happy chinese new year!
yes!
the exciting time of the year is here once again
new clothes
food
angpows!
wheee..
my sis and mum sewed a skirt for me
a joint effort kind of thing.
its really very very nice.
and i cant wait for the bakua and peanut cookies
and pineapple tarts
oh crap im getting hungry
hahhaha
-
had quite a fulfilling day today
school ended at 230.
hahaha sorry joe, joy, wing, etc etc
im not trying to rub salt in the wound ok..
anyway i was doing econs in the foyer
then jason showed daryl and i this picture he drew
he drew an OLD WOMAN
and they both said she looked like me
wahh thanks im so honoured lor.
later joakim and mr eagles came
ok i have no idea how to spell joakims name
anyway hes totally full of crap
so gay
then after sitting there for like eternity,
i realised i was late for drama rehearsal
well because no one told me the time was pushed up
thanks alot man.
like, totally.
im like some ill-informed crap piece of dontknowwhat
ughhh
anyway drama went quite ok
but it was freezing in the dance studio
and i think i kinda pissed mr chan off because i kept using my hp
hahaha i was messaging
and that stupid fazly kept calling my hp
oh well.
after drama ended i went down to parkway to meet fazly, kenji and their friend nigel
cus my sis called to say that we were going to tampines mall to eat dinner
sushi!!
so i told her i would go straight from school and meet them there.
and since fazly lives in tampines
i took bus with him to TM.
wahh hes super full of crap
and a stupid thief as well
idiot stole something from my student diary
hmm in the end i reached TM at 845pm
haha so late
i went to genki sushi to meet my family
and fazly went to buy cny cards. hahahha
the sushi was satisfying. yum.
after that my family went shopping for my brothers new year clothes
i think the shirt is very nice lehh
but its quite ex for a shirt like that.
hmm i almost saw someone i didnt want to see today
i cant wait for tomorrows pot luck!
so exciting.
hahha it always is anyway.
and tomorrows reunion dinner at my grandmas house.
yayy!
steamboat and abalone and everything else delicious.
i am so gonna grow fatter now.
like i havent been.
hahha alrights.
my parents just left the house to go to Giant to shop for new year foodstuffs
its open 24hours today, specially for cny.
hahah so funny.
its 1215am now.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 21.1.04
Sunday, January 18, 2004
i hate my knee
its so frustrating
its hurting
why does it have to hurt so much?
it reminds me of the boyband, tension.
theres so much tension in my knee..!
ughhhhhhhhh
is it true that a torn ligament will never heal?
haiiii
my ear is bleeding
its swollen as well
crap earhole
maybe its the earring
probably dirty or something
and now its so painful
blood plus plasma
yuck.
change ears, anyone?
im disintegrating
Godrocksmysocks (: - 18.1.04
daryl:
fan club your head ah
theres no such thing ok
talk rubbish.
maybe for nicole, yes
but not anywhere near.
hahah and i am not lame!
i walk perfectly fine.
oh yea.. actually no.
i have an injured knee.
joe:
haha yeaa so true
i only pretend i know
well i have to, right
im leader of this ntu thing as well..
hhaha and i presented
so i have to put on a front as though i know so much
hahahaha the actress in me lives.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 18.1.04
God is good
really. really. really good
i am so thankful.
ahhhhh!
anyway, today was a tramautised-turn-miraculous day
haii
careless me.
see right, i was on my way to church this morning
and because i thought i was going to be late,
i took a cab
in the end i was on time
so i wanted to call chuili to find out where she is
and that was when i realised that
I LEFT MY HANDPHONE IN THE CAB.
ughh i could have died
the world practically stopped
i used raymonds hp to call mine
it was ringing.
but i called like about 3-4 times
and no one picked it up
samuel goh started praying
i prayed as well
and continued calling
then samuel goh sang
God will make a way
and that was when i started crying
i felt really horrible
the phone wasnt even a year old yet
and all my messages,
all my numbers..
everything gone!
then my sister took raymonds phone to call the cab company
and i used enweis hp to call mine
and finally there was a response!
the cab driver picked it up!!!
and told me he was eating breakfast at the coffee shop nearby
i was so so so so so so relieved
but then again, i was afraid the uncle would disappear with my hp
but in the end, he drove back to church to return the hp to me
i really thank the Lord.
that the uncle was so nice,
that the uncle didnt steal my hp to sell and make money
and that everything is in tact.
i told you God is good.
second thing:
God is still good.
He was so good to me yesterday
remember yesterday i had the ntu-jc challenge presentation thing?
yeaa and it went really quite well!
i was rather nervous before our turn came
and got so jittery
nonetheless, butterflies in my stomach
i needed to pee so badly as well.
but it all went smoothly
only a few screw-ups here and there
when i said some stuff wrongly
and yikangs video didnt play for a while
and shimons video kinda lagged
and when i accidentally pressed the right click on the mouse
and the options box popped out
haha i could hear stan and kim whisper
shit next to me
so funny
but it was good.
at least i hope it was impressive
and that we will win the best presentation award!
hahah hmm yyea.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 18.1.04
Friday, January 16, 2004
joe:
alright i really did go visit you and joy and wingman
and xiaolings diary.
haha someone should be so happy now,
surrounded by so many pretty girls.
can sleep together somemore..
hahahaha dont think dirty!
-
had ntu-jc challenge preparations today
kaoooxx
i hate it when people make fun of my ignorance
i mean,
yes i dont know much about science and computers
but that does not give others a right to make fun of me
and talk to me in a very disbelieving tone
like, wth!
which planet did you originate from?!
well if i were to tell you off cynically about not knowing anything about literature and practical criticism,
would you like it?
its happened so many times
fine. i dont know hypothermia and blood loss and all that crap nonsense
and i dont know how to do nice powerpoint slides,
or use adobe very well again
but that does not mean you can exclaim in my face
or shout a
puii at the computer screen.
if you think you are so great,
why didnt you do the ppt slides by yourself in the first place?
why push the responsibility to others,
then criticise them for doing it.
i dont know about you,
but i do have my pride, thank you very much.
-
alright, with that off my chest
i can now lay aside the pms-ey side of me
and cool.
hmm we had a funny experience today.
we had to do some filming for shimon acting as a weatherman
and the others just ran behind him
to pretend it is the cjc annual x-country race
ermm because there was only six of us running as extras,
the video caught our faces again and again and again.
like, over five times?
ohman.
but it was hilarious.
controlling laughter is not a very easy feat.
after that i was talking to fazly
his name is funny.
he
is funny.
ohwell
saw his photos today and he is super act cool
wahhh cant stand it.
i still have no idea what the name of the other guy is
the one fazly calls
bird-scatology
that is so evil
-
alright-ey.
im off to sleep now
have to wake up so early and prepare well.
full school-u and tie.
plus blazer (!) and stockings (!!) and court shoes.
bahh which reminds me,
gen forgot to bring the court shoes for me today!
so i have to squeeze into my mums small tiny puny shoes
that hurt my left foot because my last toe is swollen and larger than life.
anyway,
tomorrow is the finals for the presentation section of the ntu-jc challenge thing.
wahhh stress.
onus is on me because im presenting
and its crucial!
we need to get best presentation award
haha to get our seven CCA points.
pray.
God will reward us accordingly.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 16.1.04
how do you handle it.
damnit
enjoy the months.
but i guess if youre happy where you will be
then so be it.
i cant say anything
i cant make you stay
-
knowing you went past that day
and having not been there
or even if i had been there
but not know you went past
i dont know what to say
idontwanttomissyou
Godrocksmysocks (: - 16.1.04
gary and khairi are in for NS today.
whoohoo hhahaha i really hope they dont turn gay
-
hmm i wish i was J1 again
its like some holiday carnival kind of mood everyday
knowing they dont really have to study much
especially for those who know they wont stay in cj after first three months
dont really have to give a hoot about discipline
ughhhh i dont want to be J2.
-
i hate terence
he is such a peeping tom
err go away terence..
haha you are perversed
you said it yourself.
horrible horny thing
oh man oh man oh man!!
terence is freaky
psychotic
ok, psychic.
he just predicted something
and two seconds later it really happened
and its not the kind of thing we know will happen.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 16.1.04
Monday, January 12, 2004
joe:
hello!
you sadist you.
anyway your class is like so far upppp
so its kind of a chore to climb all the way up
hahah but we will still see you during breaks i hope!
-
hahahahahahahha i got to see you today.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 12.1.04
Sunday, January 11, 2004
its raining
its beautiful out there
its perfect
so i will just lie in my bed
read my Bible
write in my diary
think about you
then fall asleep
am i going to meet you tomorrow?
Godrocksmysocks (: - 11.1.04
bev:
thank you so much dearr.
yea that previous post was 60percent crap
hahah it was only in that point of time that i felt like that.
but im alright now.
thanks for reminding me about whats more important in my life now.
-beeeeeg grinn
-
went out for dinner with rach, evelyn, loo and joy
i had to call loke to make him jealous
hahha but he didnt seem jealous lehh
went to fish and co.
and believe it or not,
joy, loo and i are all fish and co virgins
bahh dont laugh
ive really never eaten there before
hahah but i havent eaten at many places before.
oh well but it was a good experience
the staff there are so friendly as well!
especially claire
i hope she gets a pay rise.
rach and i bought skirts after that
very nice!
got home real late
pissed my mum off
and she nagged me about discipline.
oooooops.
i guess its because i have been out late too much for my own good
i mean, school has started
and i do not believe in staying out late during school weeks or even the school term
monday we had facil briefing, then i had drama exco meeting
which ended super late.
then wednesday i was at youth park
and reached home like, 10plus?
friday i had meeting with adrian and mich
and only got home at 11plus.
and last night, saturday, i reached home at 11plus again.
haii this cannot continue
else my mum will get pissed,
my relationship with her will deteriorate
my studies will go crap again
and my energy will just get sapped.
oh boy.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 11.1.04
Thursday, January 08, 2004
i think i smile too much
you see me so jovial and happy everyday of my life
you see me enjoying myself so much
you see me always smiling and laughing, as though i am really carefree and never having any worries.
but you dont see what i really am like deep inside.
because i can be sad.
seems so unrealistic to be sprouting all these.
-
i always say i dont want to get married
and i always say that i am totally fine with being single
but at one point of time in your life,
you will definitely want to experience falling in love, being in love, and being loved in return.
the joys of knowing there will be someone to depend on at the lowest point of your life
and having someone to share good news with
the special someone who can hold your hand when you are scared
and hug you when you feel unloved
or the someone you can just call anytime of the day when you are utterly bored and while time away by talking just about anything
someone you can sing silly songs with
someone whom you can give your food to when you are not hungry
the special someone to tell you stupid jokes when you are down, not afraid of looking stupid.
and of course someone who can tell you how much God loves you when you feel things are not going your way.
and someone to encourage you to continue and perservere in serving the Lord.
the special someone ready to sacrifice for you
and the very person whose hand you want to be holding when your closest kin passes on to Heaven.
i feel so unloved
is that all?
Godrocksmysocks (: - 8.1.04
orientation is finally over
its has been quite something.
i mean, tiring and stressful.
but still, it was very fulfilling
and i thoroughly enjoyed myself.
everything went really well.
1T33 is just so endearing.
enthusiastic and so full of fun.
including the cross-dressing and dragon boating
i couldnt have enjoyed myself more.
ohdearohdear
more people are calling me bimbotic.
errrr isnt it obvious its just an act?
i mean, i only
act bimbotic.
-haiiiii.
im so glad joy is enjoying her time is cj
although i dont know if i should be encouraging her to stay
because cj isnt top five
but cj arts is top five in singapore though.
but my spirits gets lifted each time i see my fellow cellgroup member!
err no im
not talking lesbian-y stuff here.
its just that her bubbly endearing nature rubs off onto me
hahaha i suppose that should be a good thing right?
then i wont be so tired and lethargic and dead after orientation.
ermm many many many people are saying that:
joy and i look alike.
and even sound alike.
and our characters are very alike as well.
ermm is that freaky or what.
haha to find someone so so similar to me
but both of us do not find any similarities between us.
oh man.
constipation is killing me
Godrocksmysocks (: - 8.1.04
I LOST WEIGHT!!!!!
THREE WHOLE KILOGRAMS!!
praise be to God.
-muahhhh i love my Daddy in Heaven!
Godrocksmysocks (: - 8.1.04
Sunday, January 04, 2004
this is weird
i click on my own blog web add
but it sends me to the blogger page instead
http://new.blogger.com
weird.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 4.1.04
Friday, January 02, 2004
Godrocksmysocks (: - 2.1.04
Thursday, January 01, 2004
2004 new year resolutions:
1. A levels. like, duh. isnt it obvious. 3 As and 2 A1s. but lets be realistic. if i get at least a B for my chinese i will be very glad. but pray its B3.. for GP, i have to do very well. because i wanna get into mass com. and obviously they will look at your language scores. hmm A2? and for the three subjects, 3 As. if not 2 As and 1 B.
B maybe for econs. hahaha
2. read through the bible once. ive always told myself to but always falter through the months. and to do my quiet time everyday. yes i must i must i must.
3. GOLD for SYF drama. gold! gold! gold!
4.control my temper more. yes, i have certainly improved from last time. but there is still room for improvement. there always will be.
5. lose weight! ok 3-5 kg this year. its useless setting high high goals, like, losing 10kg. because its unattainable. so i guess this will satisfy me some. i wish i could do sit ups everyday. but i cant! ive got back problem. shooooot. how crap. i have no idea how to tone my stomach otherwise! help me.
6. drink alot of water. and i mean plain water. wahh so tasteless. but this way i can clear my body system better and hopefully,
hopefully, rid of my bugging constipation.
7. no involvement of relationships this year! hahaha but i never have. so it wont be that tough i guess. oh yea, this is a pact dora and i made together! in this this way, i can put my full commitment into serving in church as cell leader and head of the dance and drama ministry, and of course A levels.
8. no skipping of any lectures or lessons. AT ALL. do not be influenced by others who want to skip!
9. no handing in of homework late, unless very very fool-proof, fire-proof, water-proof, valid reasons can be given. and no cheating during class tests. especially econs! haha dont know means dont know. then you learn.
10. dont be so grumpy. dont know how im going to do that though.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 1.1.04
