Wednesday, April 30, 2003
the previous entry was quite boring. in a sense. oh wells.
most importantly!! im really really really really happy!!! ok. see right, before the Os results and postings were out, there were auditions held for cj drama public performance. they required committment to cj if we went for the auditions. i (plus broc) werent sure if we were staying in cj. so we didnt go for the auditions!! and i really regretted. ok so today, lorr and i were going to class when we saw ms koh. she told me that she needed help from a few of us for the public performance. i thought she was talking abt helping out backstage cus last week we volunteered (to get out cca point!).. but noooooo! instead, she needs us to act! but not in the public performance piece itself. just as a troope to mingle with the crowd. we'll be any character we want. dressed up and all! like a carnival kind of atmosphere! so exciting, rightttttttt??????? yes!! -esta jumps around-
anyway. today was just another day. other than that happy happy event as described above. had pe! ran ran.. then did standing broad jump. shung wai was super! the rest of the lessons were all normal. i guess. we were passing food all over the class today. and audrey kept getting caught by tbs for eating. her excuse, 'i dont know when he's looking at me or not!' haha concrete evidence provided.. max was being an idiot the whole day. even nat nut said that he's mean. stupid monkey stupid monkey!
oh oh oh! let me tell you a joke!
question: what is one ballet that nut would never want to go to??
answer: nutcracker!!
haha ok. i feel so bad now. just pangsehed neo for tmr. sorry neo..!!
PW is going to snuff the light out of my life. and my tolerance.
-but esta is still jumping around!-
Godrocksmysocks (: - 30.4.03
took from xiu's blog..
x. name = esta
x. birthday = 2 july 1986
x. piercings = dont have.. though i pierced my safety pin through my skin today. ha not counted
x. tattoos = oh my self-inflicted tattoo on my left hand. it was purely accidental
x. height = 168..
x. shoe size = not sure. same as xiu, it ranges. but only from 7-9?
x. hair colour = naturally black!
x. length = just past the shoulder
x. siblings = one older sister and younger brother
x. pets = last time had hamsters.. then turtles. and fishes. but all died
last...
x. movie you rented = who rents movies in spore?
x. movie you bought = didnt buy movies..
x. song you listened to = 'black or white' by michael jackson!!!!!! and a bit of 'dream' by cranberries
x. song that was stuck in your head = black or white!!!!
x. song you've downloaded = the other time my sis tried dl-ing on the new com, it crashed.. duh!
x. cd you bought = can it be the last cd that i got?? then its the demo lorr gave me!!
x. cd you listened to = my sis' random songs. black or white!!!
x. person you've called = my mummy.
x. person that's called you = my daddy.
x. tv show you've watched = hao er hao nu (er).
x. person you were thinking of = uhhh...
do...
x. you have a bf or gf = nope
x. you have a crush on someone = probably? probably not..
x. you wish you could live somewhere else = england!
x. you think about suicide = yea. last time.
x. you believe in online dating = actually no
x. others find you attractive = huh? no.
x. you want more piercings = nopes!
x. you want more tattoos = nopes either!
x. you drink = water lah
x. you do drugs = no!!
x. you smoke = no!!
x. you like cleaning = only when im in the right mood.
x. you like roller coasters = its ok.. but my heart practically leaps out
x. you write in cursive or print = print when i have time, cursive during lecture.
x. you carry a donor card = haha for what?
Godrocksmysocks (: - 30.4.03
Tuesday, April 29, 2003
innocent kiss - you're cute and sweet and like it
that way
What Sign of Affection Are You? brought to you by Quizilla
this is my brother's results! so amazingly not surprising. though i know he cheated on the test!!! cus i was sitting right there looking at him do the test.. hahaha ok. he's only 12. forgive him..
yes lorr! i refuse to do the pokemon test!! thats for laughing at my typosssssssss.. which she still is.. evil lorr.. she's sulking and fuming.. but i dont care!!!!! she's evil!!!!!
and she claims she's not.. right. who wld believe her right?!!!??!!!?
Godrocksmysocks (: - 29.4.03
right. lorr is sitting beside me staring at me type all these typos.. haha she's so evil she keeps cracking up at all my typos.. i told you my brain works too fast for my fingers.. haha lorr you're EVIL!! oh btw refer to lorr's blog for the fuller picture..
esta says: i am so nice to invite you to my house k!!!
lorr says: yes yes, my dear sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet esta!!!! ahahhahahaha :)
esta says: that was so
sarcastic sweet.. sickly sweet.. like what shuming wld say: cringe-y sweet.. whatever
lorr says: as long as i'm sweet!!! ehhehe, yay i get to eat dinner here too!!! one day i shall cook for you esta!!!! and you will know my culinary prowess!!! hahaha
esta says: its sushi tonight!!! thats why my brother had to run out to buy carrots.. and chase after a taxi.. in a sense
ok lorr is still cracking up and extending her evil-ness to laughing at every other word.. shoot. i shall never ever ever ever type in front of lorr anymore. hmph.. esta still fumes..
this is quite a fun blog.. haha oh!! listening to lorr's demo just now. im so honoured a broadway star is sitting right beside me!!! and she visited me at home!!! whoo hoo!! i shall tell my brother that he better behave.. he's talking to a star!!!! though he already has one at home.. ME!
shameless
Godrocksmysocks (: - 29.4.03
Monday, April 28, 2003
took this off everyone elses blogs..
three things i love
1. talking!
2. performing
3. when its night time. im at home. the thunder rumbles out loud. the wind chimes on the front porch ring incessantly. and i know its going to rain soon. that exact feeling. the perfect feeling.
three things i hate
1. being misunderstood or assumed
2. when people make me feel inferior or look down on me
3. being unsecured about things
three things i don’t understand
1. geometric progression, sigma notation, mathematical induction
2. why guys cant be the ones to have periods and get pregnant instead
3. why some people can eat a lot and never grow fat.
three things on my desk
(I take this as school desk? Cus my home desk got too many things..)
1. bottle of soap
2. bottle of shampoo
3. tissue box
three things i'm doing right now
1. thinking
2. typing this
3. falling asleep
three things i want to do before i die
1. jump into a waterfall!!
2. become an established actress !!
3. get married, have two children, make a difference in people’s lives, be contented and fulfilled in life, then die.
three things i can do
1. elasticity.. haha
2. grow faaaat
3. act!
three ways to describe my personality
1. contradictive and confused
2. fluctuating and fickle
3. extrovert and emotional
three ways to describe my looks
1. fair. can never get tanned
2. FAT
3. queen amidala.. uhh..
three things i cant do
1. get people to understand
2. feel absolutely secured at times.
3. understand myself.. haha
three things i think you should listen to
1. eminem!!
2. “what the world needs now is love”
3. when i talk.. listen and not hear
three things i don’t think you should listen to ever
1. avril lavigne (puke and die)
2. all the things she said by tatu!!!!!
3. avril lavigne again.
three things i say the most
1. ‘super’
2. ‘bian tai’
3. *screams*
three of your absolute favourite food
1. or lua. (bu yao or)
2. mee hoon kuey with a lot of chilli! but the real ban mian kind of chilli only..
3. langsana
three drinks you drink regularly
1. water. (thanks evelyn for the water bottle!! haha)
2. chrysanthemum tea. My favourite after PE drink
3. double boiled chicken soup. (my mum makes it almost every other day)
three things you’d like to learn
1. how to be stoical
2. modern ballet
3. how to feel good about myself
three shows you watched when you were a kid
1. sesame street!
2. power rangers
3. superman, batman.. all the save the day shows..
three shows you watch now
1. chuang shi ji just ended! And louis koo died in the show!
2. friends
3. survivor
(but don’t really watch anymore)
three of your best friends (cum good friends)
1. I don’t like naming people..
2. its like giving them a label
3. strange? nvm..
three of the best songs
1. black and white – michael jackson
2. superman - eminem
3. torn - natalie imbruglia (this songs reminds me of my grandfather. That day I bought this cd in early afternoon, and he passed away in late afternoon..)
three of the best movies
1. girl, interrupted.
2. 8 mile.
3. XXX.
three things you wish they knew
(I take ‘they’ as everyone else?? uhh..)
1. how my mind functions. what my reasons and intentions for doing things are. And how come I usually think differently from others.. well even I also don’t know why..
2. how it ever felt like wanting to die.. when all you can do everyday is simply drag your lifeless body around and mope.
3. how much I really want to make it big in the performance scene.. haii
three things that made me cry
1. memories - of everything and anything
2. regrets - though my greatest regret now doesn’t make me cry lahh
3. deaths - grandparents, mostly.
three things that make you smile
1. performing on stage
2. when I receive due praise or recognition.
3. (the thought of you.. oops)
three things that make you laugh
1. when im with all my friends.. sec sch friends. marina mandarin! sentosa!
2. my current class.. lorr, nut, gen, iris, mel.. etc etc..
3. phoebe in friends. she’s so bimbotic!
three things you would make
1. make it big in the performing arts and entertainment scene!!
2. make a difference in people’s lives
3. make mr tan bs hate me less!!! ughh!
Godrocksmysocks (: - 28.4.03
Friday, April 25, 2003
when was the last time i blogged? tuesday? hmm..
anyway we just changed econs lecturer. (dunno his name) basically cus we're doing production and cost now. well just as the lecture was about to begin, gen and iris were making a ruckus behind me. i was halfway turned around. and the lecturer picked on ME instead! whatever!!
what happened:
lecturer: "that girl over there! you! why are you making so much noise!"
me: (said nothing)
he looked menacingly at me. then shot the dreaded question..
lecturer: "what's your name?"
...
long long pause
finally,
me: "uhh.. esther"
lecturer: "oh!!! so you're esther! the one mr tan always calls! no wonder mr tan always picks on you!"
laughter errupted within the lecture theatre
me: (eyes widen in embarrassment)
lecturer: is it really that hard to keep quiet?"
uhh.. if you're esther tan, then the answer is yes.
well the story doesnt end there. you see, my class has suddenlyd developed this fetish for writing nonsense during lessons. they'll write "5 best movies" or "5 sucky movies" or "5 hottest celebrities" etc then pass it around the class for us to vote. well so, sandie carried this fetish into the maths lecture.. she wrote "person in class with the biggest eyes" down on the paper. i took the paper and wrote a big big GENEVIEVE. then passed to to nimrta who was sitting in front of me. well call me suay.. i was caught by the teacher. mr ho arrowed nim first. "why are you passing paper around? to that girl behind?!".. well i sort of dodged and tried to hide behind beverly so he wouldnt spot me and pick on me.. in the end he made it worse! he said, "that girl behind! why are you bowing down to pray?!" and likewise.. he asked me my name also. i said "esther" and he distorted it and practically 'flung' it out of his mouth.. "es-TAAA!" ... duh! then max msged me.. "esther stop praying" double duh!
ugh. im traumatised.
gave hamzah his birthday present today. he looked so happy, lorr and i felt equally happy too. haha happy birthday ham!!
could have gone to meet wen they all at seoul garden today after sch. but didnt cus initially was supposed to go out. but didnt either! i stayed in school to study! stayed with mel, iris and gen. then they left. and max came down to the library after he ended lessons. i was actually studying my econs, making notes and preparing my essay questions. but that chinese monkey came and talked so much. distrupted my studying.
hmm think that gen is really really lame. all her cute this cute that. well everyone in class calls me 'es'. which just sounds like 'ass'. but whats new..
Godrocksmysocks (: - 25.4.03
Tuesday, April 22, 2003
Your Heart is Orange
What Color is Your Heart? brought to you by Quizilladun have
amazing!!! i love orange! whoo hoo!!
Godrocksmysocks (: - 22.4.03
lorr: thanks so much. for everything! especially the bus ride home today. cheered me up a little. i half forgot that i wasnt feeling well. and your story about that pacifier.. haha yupp. thanks my good ol' barrier! hope you're fine right now. eating pizza.. plus the company.. better be safe than sorry! no eye candies.. awwww......
-actually-
im in quite a foul mood today. reason being: MR TAN BS. right. he has completely destroyed my days in school. everyday picking on me. giving me attitude. using his 'defence mechanism' as my sister puts it. whatever it is. he's lost my respect. i told my parents about him. tomorrow there's parents cum teacher meeting in school. my mum even asked if i needed them to go look mr tan up to talk to him. but no way. its useless. all mr tan will do is merely push all the blame upon me. and twist my fate into something more horrific. of course he thinks he's always correct. and that everything is my fault. has he even heard of anything such as PIAN JIAN. moron.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 22.4.03
Monday, April 21, 2003
i never felt much less a fool before today. crossed the road to take 154 home. in this case, i would reach eunos mrt station and my mum could fetch me from there. but nooooo. i called home and my brother told me my mum didnt have the car with her. so she couldnt fetch me from the mrt station. and i was far too lazy to walk back across the long long overhead bridge to the other side.. so i decided to figure a way home myself. well i sure did. but it took me more than an hour to get home. i got off 154 halfway at around macpherson secondary school there when i saw that bus 40 stopped by that bus stop. so when bus 40 came, i boarded. but got really really confused. well it just seemed to journey back the way i came on bus 154. i panicked. alighted the bus and called my mum. she didnt know what to do. me neither. my dear EZ link card played me out by containing only $ -0.17. good thing i still had that $1 coin. so i just boarded a bus 40 again at the stop opposite the road. looked like a clueless bum when i asked the uncle if this bus was heading towards bedok. well i
was clueless. anyhows, as it cruised along the road (name unknown to me).. i realised that it was heading in the same direction as the previous bus 40! i prayed. and amazingly i managed to figure out that what i just went through on bus 40, was actually a
round-a-bout. call me dumb or call me dumb. my goodness. well i sure didnt inherit my father's genes of good direction sense. what a tiring day.
good thing we dont have any homework today.
had pe today. and got a blister on my big toe. peeling peeling. this was why: we ran out of cj to the not-so-nearby park and ran around and around and around. my ankles were hurting me. so i decided to run without my shoes. and after that my socks got really dirty. so i took then off too and was barefooted. well no surprise about that blister huh. haii. im so accident prone.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 21.4.03
Saturday, April 19, 2003
the rain it whispers
the wind chime rings
the skyline flashes
my soul it sings
the thunder resounds
i feel betrayed
it was supposed to be beautiful
but the joy delayed
the truth revealed
there's too much pain
i'll do my crying
in the rain
--
why am i even blogging this. when i know you never come here. and will never read it. you would never have guessed. and you will never know. lets just keep it this way.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 19.4.03
Friday, April 18, 2003
good friday today. performance over. and im feeling so nostalgic now. all those weeks of rehearsals. just rounded up today. in 45min. im always like that. after a big performance is over, i just sit here and pin for all those past days. and the fact that im one person who holds fast on to memories doesnt help one bit at all. haii. nvm.
i was so full of energy for the dance.. it totally overwhelmed. haha though my pants were kind of dropping.. they were already resting on my hips.. but i didnt expect them to provide somewhat discomfort when i was dancing. it wasnt really very discreet either when i pulled my pants up to safety halfway during the dance. i was far too obvious. oops..
my family was just talking about me and drama over dinner. my parents dont seem to mind the fact that im serious about going into drama as a career. maybe, just maybe, i even felt a sense of excitement in my father? haha.. he even mentioned sending me to some drama academy in HOLLYWOOD. right.. ok. nvm. anyway my mum's still skeptical. wet blanket. i still have to get that A levels done right. then go uni. get a degree. then venture into drama. haii. waiting is good. whatever.
i got so frustrated just now.. my mum's being so unreasonable. im always short of money for my own usage. and i need clothes. but for obvious reasons i cant purchase any.. so i always tell her that i need to buy clothes but have absolutely nothing to buy then with. and she said that if i really need, (
and its reasonable to her).. then i can ask her for money. but not too often. i have never ever asked her to buy me clothes for the past few years. amazingly. and well today, i just asked her nicely if she could give me money to buy jeans. and she gave me that look of distaste and unsatisfaction. first thing she said: "what do you need jeans for? you cant wear them to school what." then she went on about how i should not buy. made me so mad inside. but i couldnt explode. or else all the more i would have no ground to fight for that pair of jeans. tell me who's being unreasonable now!!! clothes are a necessity! provided she wants her daughter to go round looking like a complete idiot. ugh!!! im peeved!!!!!!
current mood: down in the dumps.. haii.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 18.4.03
Thursday, April 17, 2003
what color are you?
Godrocksmysocks (: - 17.4.03
sonnet
seen, perhaps understood perfectly
cant impart how not mistaken at all
bewitched and mesmerised ‘twas was I
by which the spell under did I befall
realisation; neither a friend nor foe
never a supposition to have upon stumbled
reality hits not once but double
upon the wakening of sounds did rumble
reasons no reason to survive nor subsist
spirits rise awake within the burns
four doors do create an obstruction
forbidden like premeditated distance
episodes end like tales undisclosed
as the pain the silence have bestowed
+did charm me like the moon+
Godrocksmysocks (: - 17.4.03
great. finally one day i get back home early enough to be able to update my blog.
only reached home at 12am last night. no, more like this morning.. had drama after school. which extended till past 6 cus of the briefing thing.. then rushed back home, ate half my dinner, bathed.. and my father graciously sent me to church. for good friday concert rehearsal. the dance was rather atrocious. everyone's off timing. and its really qt tiring too. the dance requires absolute energy to the max. the visual crew added in those kind of disco lights.. where the whole hall is dark. and only streak lights are shooting at us on stage.. and making us so confused. it was so dark we kinda got a shock. well. good friday's tomorrow! nvm. i believe God works miracles! the sign language song was ok. i just forgot once.. once only! wow.. wish gerald would stop laughing during the drama piece.. its supposed to be sad! makes everyone else laugh too..
yea so we danced and rehearsed and danced and danced somemore.. and only ended at 1145pm. good thing evelyn's father drove me home.. dropped dead onto my bed after bathing.. didnt have any time to do my homework. the happy thing at the end of the day was... I LOST ONE KG!! whoo hoo!!
natasha was being so lame today. she and her shit. haha shitty coke float or smth like that.. throughout the whole morning our vocab was limited to that one word only. sadly. haha nvm we've promised that that word is forbidden now!
oh mr fahy's a good teacher! my insights are developed so much now. but his expectation is that all of us in 1T06 gets 65 and above for GP promos.. scary.
mr tan hates me to the core. nv fails to pick on me every single econs lecture. seems like he cant end an econs lecture without calling on me once. he always thinks that im talking and not paying attention! ugh. dumb guy. spoil my day.
my maths teacher really has some inferior complex or smth. hes trying to hard. but making it easy for us to detest him. twitchy!
im like doing a review on my teachers.. how retarded.
i just feel like typing and typing and typing.. but i guess all of you reading this will get rather fed up.. heh.
ok anyway.. discovery of this week. i realised that i've been paying SO much attention during lectures and tutorials.. except i may drift a little during double period lessons.. like gp. and lit. but seriously.. im amazed by myself. never realised i had so much drive and passion in that i-hate-studying-i-cant-study mentality i bore since last year. whats happening to me?! ...... qt proud of myself though. i understand econs.. its really qt grasp-able.. now im contemplating econs S paper.. uhh. yea. dont really want to live in my sister's shadow. must prove myself. haii..
no kidding im being so guai and so enthusiastic about school now. its absolute insanity. seriously. such a far cry from last year. and of course the first three months. the old esther seems to be disappearing.. im morphing into someone else!!
Godrocksmysocks (: - 17.4.03
Saturday, April 12, 2003
[my name is]: esta.
[height?]: 168cm.
[in the morning i am]: half-dead.
[all i need is]: confidence?
[love is]: sacrifices.
[if i could see one person right now]: i wont.
[i'm afraid of]: being paralysed. physically that is.
[i dream about]: assortment of stuff. happy sad stupid. you name it.
-have you ever ?
[pictured your crush naked?]: no way! thats disgusting!!
[been in love]: no.
[cried when someone died]: of course.
[lied]: who hasnt.
-which is better ?
[coke or pepsi]: to me both are about the same. i prefer root beer!
[flowers or candy]: both are just as fine i suppose.
[tall or short]: in between? neither too tall or too short.
-with the opposite sex.
[what do you notice first?]: appearance.. height inclusive i guess.
[last person you slow danced with]: havent danced for a long time.
[worst question to ask]: why are you always so smelly?!
-who.
[makes you laugh the most?]: when the few of us are together – me xiu kang wen neo sara.
[makes you smile]: think everyone has a way of making me smile in one way or another.
[gives you a funny feeling when you see them]: nobody. serious.
[who do you have a crush on?]: utt!
[easiest to talk to]: my sis.
-do you ever?
[stay on aim, waiting for someone special to IM you]: no.
[save AOL/aim conversations]: no.. for what??
[wish you were a member of the opposite sex]: sometimes. wish that guys were the ones to get pregnant instead.
[cry because of someone saying something to you]: im not called an emotional bum for nothing..
-have you ever
[fallen for your best friend]: no way!
[been rejected?]: in the bgr sense? no.. but in other senses? yes. like my ideas being rejected etc
[rejected someone]: uhh.. no..
[used someone]: no.. oh only genevieve to help block the sun cus shes so tall.
[been cheated on]: nope!
[cheated on someone]: no either.
[done something you regret]: without a doubt. many many many things. ugh.
-who was the last person..
[you talked to on the phone]: uhh.. my sis? she called to ask me to open the door for her.
[you hugged]: cant remember..
[you instant messaged]: neo.
[instant messaged you?]: neo.
[you laughed with]: my sis.
-do you.. are you.
[color your hair]: yea last time.. long long ago.
[habla espanol]: huh?
[smoke cigarettes]: yuck! never! thats too gross. my grandfather passed away cus of that..
[obsessive]: sometimes.
[could you live without the computer?]: probably?
[how many peeps are on your buddylist?]: uhh quite a lot.. from all over
[what's your favorite food?]: mee hoon kuey!
[whats your favorite fruit?]: durian. mango. papaya. banana. peach.
[drink alcohol?]: my throat cant take it man.
[like watching sunrises or sunset]: of course.
[what hurts the most, physical or emotional pain?]: emotional. duh.
[trust others way too easily?]: yea sure.
eight songs that get stuck in your head frequently:
1. bonnie and clide (jay-z and beyonce)
2. everyday (bon jovi)
3. to you (hillsongs)
4. wo nan guo - 5566. after watching that mvp qing ren lah!!!
5. bring me to life (evanescence)
6. superman (eminem!) - parts of it only..
7. underneath it all (no doubt)
8. torn (natalie imbruglia)
four beverages you drink frequently:
1. water.
2. chrysanthemum tea (the packet kind. and the one my mum makes with tea leaves)
3. root beer (neo!! remember!!)
4. mountain dew.
five tv shows you liked when you were a little kid:
1. power rangers.
2. sesame streets.
3. those brainless save the day kind of shows.. any kind. but cant remember titles.
4. --
5. --
four places to go in your area:
1. parkway parade.
2. haagen daaz.
3. east coast park.
4. siglap. the row of shops there.. macs. starbucks. gelare. killiney.
(my house got not many places to go..)
four things you do when you're bored.
1. daydream. or want to sleep.
2. draw/ doodle.
3. want to go out.
4. use the computer.
four things that never fail to cheer you up:
1. being appreciated.
2. being remembered..
3. baking cookies!
4. watching chuang shi ji and louis koo!!
four things you can't live without:
1. bible.
2. talking.
3. good good good friends.
4. a stage.
about ten years ago *list three things*
1. i came back to singapore after a year in england.
2. i had a british accent..
3. i fell down in the school playground and caused that gross scar on my knee. its still there.
about two years ago *list three things*
1. i was still in stnicks
2. dance was my life
3. i was about two metres away from president nathan before! haha
about one year ago *list three things*
1. everything was ‘OOP’, ‘huh’, ‘err’, ‘super’..
2. i had an op on my back
3. i got knocked down by a car
today.
1. my mum woke me up at 9am!!! and i really wanted to sleep in..
2. i baked cookies again. its addictive..
3. hasnt ended yet
seven things you love.
1. performing.
2. talking!
3. drawing cum doodling on lecture notes. err..
4. stars.
5. eminem’s songs.
6. ORANGE!!
7. daydreaming.
seven things you hate..
1. waking up cranky.
2. my hair. currently.. grow hair! grow!
3. being misunderstood or assumed.
4. inferiority.
5. having to lose and let go
6. people nagging at me!
7. having too many choices.. stuck in dilemmas.
seven things on your desk:
1. bible (QT book also)
2. a box wen gave me.
3. tissue paper (tender soft..)
4. surgical tape.
5. handphone.
6. gloves.
7. sab’s socks.
(actually much more than seven things)
seven facts about you:
1. left handed.
2. dont like to follow the norm. led by my heart rather than my head
3. accident prone. butterfingered.
4. procrastinate.
5. contradict myself tremendously.
6. like to make people laugh.
7. defiant.. subtle defiance. but sometimes blatant.
seven artists/bands people should give a listen to:
1. eminem.
2. eminem.
3. eminem.
4. eminem.
5. eminem.
6. eminem.
7. natalie imbruglia.
three things you like about the opposite sex:
1. character cum personality.
2. sense of humour (likeable to me??)
3. ability to talk and joke.
three things you would eat on the last day of your life:
1. mee hoon kuey with lots of chilli.
2. langsana with lots of mozzarella cheese.
3. or lua. bu yao or.
four things you'd like to learn:
1. ballet (modern)
2. how to keep quiet for one whole entire day.
3. to be stoical.
4. --
Godrocksmysocks (: - 12.4.03
Friday, April 11, 2003
here it comes again
cannot out run my desire
cover my decent
and throw the
beauty on the fire
drawn towards the edge
do i assume i could fly
every secret shared
why do i drink
the feelings dry
dont go too far
limitation scars
tonight
could i be lost forever
to drown
my soul in
sensory
pleasure
sensory
pleasure
here it comes again
you raise the bar even higher
i cannot catch my breath
so throw the
beauty on the fire
dont push too hard
limitation scars
natalie imbruglia - beauty on the fire
Godrocksmysocks (: - 11.4.03
third day of school since school reopened. realised that i never did blog anything about school. ok here goes. i finally got a class on wed.
1T06. with nice people. and Mr David L. Fahy as home tutor. mixed feelings. and besides, my classroom's on the fifth level. i'll be a stick by the end of this year.
wed and thurs we had real lessons. all my lectures have so many people. devastatingly noisy. well everyone wld say that i make up about half the composition of noise. but hey, i did listen to that thing about demand and supply. hannah, tav, iris, melissa and i were playing bingo during econs lecture. mr tan is forever picking on me. ugh. im not the only one who talked. those guys behind us were talking even louder. "B is for bingo!" duh.
today we had the remainders of the orientation. but in our own classes. built some structure. then the whole fifth level stood outside their classrooms and screamed all kinds of nonsense. mr fahy kinda shocked us by joining in. impressive. after that was just class bonding and finding class mottos and emblems etc etc.
we went to the audi for a talk on project work. and an address by bro paul. my butt ached real bad after sitting for about one and half hours. everyone's getting a little paranoid. i sneezed in the audi today and everyone around me turned and stared. and gave that funny "SARS!!!" look. i was just cold in the audi..
had lunch and then the cca fair.
went town with szuyu hannah and max. met the hair-in-his-eyes darryl. went lido to meet weiyang. szuyu was actually meeting weiyang. and we just tagged along. but we left them at 430pm to watch their movie.. errrr...
think my class is not bad. at least its not really quiet and d-e-a-d. got lorraine clara and irvin! dominic transferred over to our class from T7 today. now the class is rather big in size. 23 in total.
i tried my hand at altering my skirt yesterday. i totally and absolutely destroyed it. cut the skirt at the wrong place. i'll just get my mum to do it for me.
think im lately developing a mental block on names. and its really getting to me.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 11.4.03
Tuesday, April 08, 2003
damn it. i hate myself
Godrocksmysocks (: - 8.4.03
Monday, April 07, 2003
visited char's blog. made me recall stnicks. darn. i actually came up with this lame thing:
do i miss stnicks? yes
alot? probably
very very much? no
but drats. i am.
just seemed like yesterday that me neo xiu wen kang sara were at marina mandrin.. and then walking walking walking in the night. taking lame photos. the colours. and the darks. remember? the toilet photos too. the statues. and being chased away. then the thing about that avril sh*t-thing and idiot. and kang getting super ji dong about name game. heh. oh yea! and neo and wen thinking i was fake sleeping.. duh.
haii. reminiscence. sucks. real. bad.
cus. it. makes. me. feel. so. sad.
i cant help but mentally compare stnicks to jc life. xuan shu. if thats the word for it.
true i cant wait to get back to sch and see what jc life has in store for me. but its total unfamilarity. cant have free and easy girl talk anymore!!! ok that wasnt the main concern.
its more like.. missing all i possessed and having to let go. darn.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 7.4.03
Thursday, April 03, 2003
i went into the movie theatre, all ready to watch colin ferrell¡¯s cute unshaved face do wonders opposite al pacino¡¯s. the advertisements were on. no trailers this time. and everyone just began to see the ¡®a ¡ pictures present¡¯ ¡ ¡®a ¡ production¡¯¡
i settle in nice and snug. and all of a sudden, this sense of urgency starts creeping right up my senses. eventually it gets to my head that dear me needs the WC all right that very second. but because the human nature in me decides, to let my heart, rather than my head, lead, i continue to sit there dumbly, and stare at the screen.
¡°dont think about that absolute urgency and just think there¡¯s nothing. dont keep thing abt needing the toilet. and the need will lessen.¡±
i guess it did help a little. human psychology would have been proud of me.
lessons learnt today: never ever underestimate the power of the bladder.
second lesson of the day: wear longer pants next time.
hmph. who ask lido to be so cold. it wasnt drinks that made me suffer for those two hours. cus i did my part and got rid of that before the movie. so it has to be the result of the stupid aircon which happily decided to freeze me up. even my palms and feet were numb. pins-and-needles. bleh. horrid feeling.
Godrocksmysocks (: - 3.4.03
Wednesday, April 02, 2003
oh crap! corey clarke is really out of american idol. blah!
crap crap crap
Godrocksmysocks (: - 2.4.03
i woke up on the wrong side of the bed today. cranky, moody and all. cant wait to get back to sleep so i can wake up afresh tomorrow.
tell yourself it¡¯ll be a better day, tomorrow
everything got me cantankerous today. my brother¡¯s laziness. the incessant ringing of the phone. my dad¡¯s nagging. no breakfast. my mum¡¯s lameness. the jerky car. the tom yam soup which seemed to have a lot of coconut milk. the dumb drinks stall person. two choices of my drinks were not sold. that dreaded bee hoon. many nice clothes. no money. my sis¡¯s crazy attitude. sleepy eyes. songs on the car. my slow computer. procrastination. my hair.
forget it.
heard that the govt may extend this emergency for one more week. i just suggested to my dad that we go jb for a holiday. and my father¡¯s response? .. ¡°see first¡±.. as always. then i can go do something about the contents in my clothes cupboard..
Godrocksmysocks (: - 2.4.03
btw i just got a gbk
Godrocksmysocks (: - 2.4.03
i cut my hair yesterday.
much shorter as compared to before
but then my previous hair was so long
it can still be tied up
but farewell to french braids
Godrocksmysocks (: - 2.4.03
